Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Research firms offer perks to keep your business

By All The Excess!


In an economy that can only be described as "craptastic," one of a radio station's first and easiest budget cuts is in the area of research. The major consulting and research firms know this, and are responding with never-before-seen premiums in order to keep your business.

At The Devius Group, a "Frequent Focus Points" system lets you earn points for each focus group you schedule. Points can be redeemed for everything from kitchen appliances to family vacations. "It's like green stamps without all the licking," says Devius Group President Manilla Folder. Also, if you're looking for reasons to get rid of high-priced talent, bottom line-conscious Devius Group consultants will pen a blistering critique for a discounted fee.

Cleveland-based Holefinders, Inc. specializes in determining new formats to appeal to a market's unserved radio listeners. For the first time, they're offering a guarantee, says Holefinders CEO Dick Riviera: "If you think you know what your next format should be, put your guess in a sealed envelope and send it to us. We'll open it after your market study, and if you were right all along, our service is free! That's how sure we are that you're horribly off base."

Nebulous Research of Los Angeles continues their notorious offer to tailor research data to your desired outcome, but that secret pact still requires top dollar. However, to move cheaper packages, they now promise that if they can't prove that your music station needs to switch to a talk format, they'll pay 50% of your first year's performance royalty. Nebulous VP/GM Baxter Shiftee has curbed clients' travel expenses by agreeing to settle for business class when flying in for visits.

At Braintrust Hierarchy, a leading music testing firm, they've implemented a sweepstakes in which companies who purchase their services are entered into a monthly drawing for extravagant gifts, often with a celebrity component. This month, says BH President Doyle E. Knitter, it's "a fabulous night out on the town with champagne, limo service, a deluxe hotel suite, and an all access pass to actress Heather Locklear."

I like these guys.